My two left feet

Sometimes it feels a bit uncomfortable just to be around, going through your everyday routine. At the movies, all films look the same, at the gym you don't feel sore but numb, you don't really care if things go right or wrong, you actually don't give a crap if anything goes.

You don't pay attention to what people tell you neither you care about what they think of it. You have no appetite but still feel hungry, you go on with the next beer although you already feel dizzy. It seems as nothing makes really sense.

As if you were trying to walk around with two left feet.

We often think about things that will put our lives in perspective, that will make us open our eyes to what really matters. Then, when these things suddenly happen, when the bad news leave you numb, sinking in your sofa under waves of irony, you see no perspective. You just close your eyes and hope it goes away, you wish there was no perspective and that you still considered a new pair of pants smutted with oil, the rain you face from your window on a Saturday morning, or your moody flatmate's outbreaks of wining to be the real problems.

But you can't.

You just curse all new year's wishes that seem to have been pointless, then you go into denial and think nothing's really worth it. And then you sit back and realize all you can do is let the time pass, leave enough space between you and the uncomfortable truths that lie ahead of you, not because you want to avoid them, but because you need enough room to run when you 'll finally have to jump over them. Until then you can only try to keep balance on two left feet.