Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Where is home?


Bloc Party, wonder about it, maybe less than I do. Where it is? Where is home?

Late Friday night, the bus from the airport takes me through familiar avenues, sites of a seemingly distant everyday commute, towards the center of my favourite birthplace, which could be the most beautiful city in the world, -and perhaps at some point in history actually has already been. As we go down Vasilissis Sofias Avenue, I become aware of what never left this place. People eager to party 24 hour days without being separated from their cars are infesting every small street from here to Syntagma Square at 4 am!

In front of the Parliament I step off the bus and take a deep breath of the thin, dry air of my old capital. I am home.

But am I really? As I walk down towards Ermou Street to catch a taxi home I run across young people coming out of the nearby bars which are closing down. They all look so elegant and happy, dressed up with smart and expensive clothes. Most of them are maybe 10 years younger than me but make me look like a high-school student with my anorak and my hiking boots and the backpack I am carrying around. I get a feeling my compatibility with Barcelona is starting to become incompatible with my hometown. And as soon as the youngsters, all fun and laughter, rush by me to get a taxi before me, this feeling gets stronger. I stand there, suitcase in hand, as they pass me by with the most naturally innocent way and then I cannot but wonder. Am I a tourist in my own city?

Three days later, I have still not gone out that much. I am spending time with friends and family, mostly because it is them that mean home to me more than anything else. But I still wonder whether I am staying in because of a fear -or to put it milder, an anxiety- to face reality. Starting from tomorrow I 'll try to get as much more of AthensBios as I can, just to make sure, that even if I cannot undoubtedly state where home is, Athens is still part of it.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Submitted. What now?


This image is to celebrate closure.

Of course as in most things in life, closure is relatively hard to define and this becomes even more complicated in science. A paper submitted, after almost a year and a half of trying, does not signify closure at all, but it is at least a relief. And given the holiday spirit, just about to consume everything (literally) and everyone, hence the fireworks.

But as since noon yesterday, after having pressed this "approve submission" button I was longing for, I keep remembering a poem by my favourite Kavafis, entitled "Waiting for the Barbarians". It is because suddenly, I feel I have been so much consumed by work that I find it hard to come back to everyday life after finishing with too many pending issues. Sunday afternoon I almost enjoyed cleaning up my flat, since Saturday I have watched four films on TV already but still I find myself too tense to even go to bed before 3. It is what the poem is about -more or less-. Once a threat, (or a challenge, or a thing you had to do in any case) is not there anymore, what remains to keep you going? You suddenly find yourself feeling empty and useless and it's probably entirely your fault for having shut out every other activity just to get your stupid work done. And now, with your work simply done and you have no idea of what to do. You find yourself, a one-dimensional man, with all your interests suppressed under the weight of everyday obligations. And for this brief moment that these obligations seem to vanish you just stand there half-bored and half-overtensed, insomniac and dizzy.

And you simply wonder if two weeks of holidays are enough for you to regain perspective.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

"Devil's week" for "tender feet"



As I am getting close to 30 I still have not served my -obligatory- military service. Only to be the next to last of all my friends to still have escaped and probably the last of all that will finally do it. Among those who have suffered it already, as well as for us outsiders, the concept of a "devil's week", a 7-day military ordeal set to distinguish real men from boys is nowadays a distant legend, a story older guys in high-school would constantly recite, enriched every time with some new kind of torture to scare us off.

We are grown-ups now and we know devil's week does not exist unless you are a US Marine corps "afficionado". Nevertheless devil's weeks keep occurring, with some increasing frequency, in our everyday work life. And the last one I had, would certainly qualify as such.

The 100 hours that separated Monday morning from Friday afternoon, included the culmination of more than a year's attempts in terms of my -otherwise boring- work, the final preparation of a manuscript, rewritten as many times as Kazantzakis' "Odysseia" and a public talk in front of my colleagues -which eventually I may have convinced that somewhere inbetween parties and "happy hours", I actually try to do some research. On the margin of all that, I had to attend seminars and a number of meetings with possible future collaborators, in all a number of activities that would probably make my over-active boss feel at home but for a poor post-doctoral fellow like myself proved simply too much.

By Friday afternoon, I felt dizzy, confused and totally unable to focus even on the simplest communicative activity. This had been my devil's week and there was no doubt about it.
By Friday night, I felt all this was past already. As I was dancing in the middle of a room infested with students and post-docs, eager to see the end of this last month of 2007 and the beginning of holidays, I realized the "tender foot" I have become. There was I, having just had a week that to some hard-working people would not even qualify as rough, having beer with my colleagues, not worrying about Monday or the house's mortgage payment at the end of the month, having worked a bit more in one of the best places, in one of the most beautiful cities of Europe and I had the nerve of talking about "devil's week".

I forgot about it all, as alcohol was finding its way through my circulation to meet with fatigue and loss of sleep somewhere at the back of my head. I had a few more beers and went straight to bed.

Then, the next morning while having breakfast, I read Dorris Lessing's Nobel acceptance speech only to remember once more the extent of the privileges we relish and how "tender feet" we are becoming.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

today

L'art n'est pas à mes yeux une réjouissance solitaire. Il est un moyen d'émouvoir le plus grand nombre d'hommes en leur offrant une image privilégiée des souffrances et des joies communes. Il oblige donc l'artiste à ne pas se séparer ; il le soumet à la vérité la plus humble et la plus universelle.


Le rôle de l'écrivain, du même coup, ne se sépare pas de devoirs difficiles. Par définition,
il ne peut se mettre aujourd'hui au service de ceux qui font l'histoire : il est au service de ceux qui la subissent.

Albert Camus
Nobel Lecture

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

life postponed


This is Eric Hobsbawm, one of the world's most important (caution! not "leading", I hate this term) living historians. He is also one of the few people that I classify as "idols", or -more moderately- role models. I started reading his books at that golden age, when at the end of your college years, you realize there are things that matter much more than daily repeating the same electrophoresis assay at the biochemistry lab. Over the last decade I have read most of his main works, including his autobiography, without stopping being surprised by the insight, with which he reflects on most of the modern issues. A guy who is 91.

And who was here in Barcelona, less than a month ago, when this photo was taken for the purposes of an interview in Vanguardia. By that time I was too busy running control tests on some microarray data and meeting with journal editors. By the time the interview was published last Sunday, I was reading about html code and web servers. And by the time I decided to write about this on the blog, yesterday, I was revising a manuscript to be submitted -hopefully- next week. It seems that lately life has been being postponed and everyday has slightly shifted out of phase.

As I rolled down the Port Vell, coming back from the lab once more after 9pm I listened to Nick Drake getting right to the point "When the light of the city falls, you climb on the city walls".

Only there is no wall to climb on and over this, past the place where trivial working issues keep distracting you from opportunities to meet your idols, or read the books that are piling up on your desk, or watch the films you have lined up only to never make it to the cinema on time...

At least there are mp3 players that keep working on the background of all that and headphones that allow you to bear it in the company of your favourite sounds. But you just wish a new invention would come up that would put work in the background just for once (or maybe twice).

Monday, December 3, 2007

Alo presidente! A message to my friend Hugo.


I spent most of the weekend (including last Friday) behind closed doors, in the solitude of reading about html code and CGI scripts, things that may become useful in the near future and come handy on numerous occasions, but do not provide but a minor comfort for spending Saturday at your desk. In the midst of all that, I only had some time to have dinner with friends on Saturday and watch a film on TV yesterday night. But most of all I had the chance to follow the news after a long time, since the newspapers lying on our big table next to my PC were the only distraction I allowed myself to indulge in.

So today a few words about Chavez's lost referendum and how in principal it can prove to be a victory instead of a defeat.

The narrow margin by which the opposition won yesterday's referendum for the constitutional reform is first of all a proof that democracy is -to the contrary to what a lot of people here in Europe are trying to convince us- still alive in Venezuela. No allegations for stolen votes, forced abstention or anything like that.
[At this point I cannot avoid being provocative by asking if such a narrow defeat (50.7% against 49.2%) would have been conceded by the opposition had the result been different. Just think about that!]
But let us move on. Chavez did concede and although he meant to stand firm, he could not hide his disappointment for the more than three million votes he lost between last summer's presidential election and yesterday's referendum. It is these three million who chose not to vote that gave victory to the opposition. But let's talk a bit about what this victory signifies. To me it's a good thing. First of all for the country itself. No country is in need of a permanent ruler be it a president or a King with absolute authority. Venezuela should not commit the mistakes of other countries and above all, should not give any right to the ruthless enemies to talk about a republic tumbling towards dictatorship. Secondly, it's good for Chavez too. The "Presidente" has been flirting with Castro's mistakes far too much after being re-elected. A lost referendum, the first electoral battle he loses in nine years can be seen as a starting point for constructive self-criticism. His work up to now has been incredible and he can be remembered for this alone, if only he chooses to leave out in style by trusting his own people instead of trying to indoctrinate them at all costs. His true followers send him a message by not voting and he ought to consider it as any true leader would.

The NO in this referendum means that Venezuelans do not agree with the extension of the presidential term from six to seven years, that they do not like the same guy being able to run for president more than twice and that they would hate him having unlimited power over the country's media. On the other hand, it also means that radical reforms for the benefit of the poor, such as reducing the hours of daily work and incorporating part-timers and informal "wage-slaves" to the social welfare system will have to be postponed. But the time will come for this, sooner or later. Foreign correspondents should be cautious before they qualify yesterday's result as a rejection to Chavez's socialist program, especially when this rejection is not as firm as they would like and most of all because it is not a rejection of the program as it is a message to the president and his ambitions having led him too far this time.

My dear friend Hugo must have understood his limits and -more importantly- that it is the reforms that matter and not the person who brings them forth. The opposition, on the other hand, should now reconcile with the idea that change CAN be achieved the legal way, meaning through the electoral process and not with prepaid media propaganda or attempting to overthrow the president with money and guns arriving in the diplomatic bag. Most of all the people of Venezuela can be assured that their voice still matters and the people of the rest of the world that when it comes to matters of Venezuela it is better that the Venezuelans themselves decide, without the President of the USA or King of Spain having a say on their decisions.

Given that all sides rise to the above tasks, yesterday's outcome will prove to be for the benefit of all.

Friday, November 30, 2007

Arriving late...a lesson on human nature


My yester-day started quite well. Although I had an early wake up to wait for Adriana, which turned out to be another missed appointment in the series of many -partly due to her being Italian and partly to her being very busy with moving out-, I stayed in a good mood enjoying a long-awaited read, Herbert Marcuze's "One-dimensional man", (recently downloaded from a great site which I strongly recommend
http://www.marxists.org/reference/
). Around 10am I had to go, in order not to miss Charles' seminar about his dear selenoproteins and so there I was, with Readiohead's "Reckoner" cunningly finding its way through my inner ear, right to that special spot where a big concentration of neurons triggers the excretion of high levels of endorphine (or at least this is what reductionist neurophysiologists want us to believe). I got my bike and rushed down Avinguda Litoral only to find out that for some strange (?) reason all the "bicing" stations where full, meaning I had no place to drop off my rent-by-the-hour bike.

Such a situation is not that uncommon of course, but it became one such when the waiting time for an empty spot on any rack in a radius of 500 meters around work gradiently increased to 15, then 30 and eventually 55 minutes! Over this -under different circumstances short- period of time, my mood suffered a correspondingly gradient decline as I quickly passed from feeling superb to just nice and then from slighlty pissed to furious. My mp3 player was there to accompany this emotional decay and so Radiohead swiftly changed to Tori Amos, then to Tom Waits, only to boil down to Prodigy's "Smack my bitch up" in full blast as I ran towards an empty spot, at last, after waiting for almost an hour and with the seminar almost over.

In spite of all that, I 'd like to consider myself a positive person, who can get something out of even the most unpleasant situations. In this case -obviously influenced from my reading of Marcuse- I tried to turn my anger outside in and introspect a bit. Why was I pissed? Because a service I have paid 6 euros a year for was not working properly. But this happens with services that are far more expensive. And why was I being mean? Why was I suddenly developing a deep dislike against every person I could see placing his bike on the rack? Wasn't he one more like me, that had a seminar to attend or a meeting to make it to? It was just because THEY would make it and I was still stuck there. It seems that every service that is not designed well quickly becomes a pain simply because it turns into being competitive. And I am probably not the first to point out that competitive systems are the safest way to bring out the worst in human nature.

So there I was, listening to "Invitation to the Blues", reflecting about human nature, competition and the lost challenge of altruism. Because I have grown to believe that for the disgusting creature man is (lets not put women into this yet), altruism and solidarity remain challenges. I also came to the safe conclusion that even in the midst of the universe's uncertainty there were still things to be classified as absolute certainties and one of them was that I was definitely going to walk home in the evening.

As midnight found me in Barceloneta riding my "bicing" back to the Gotico a new certainty arose. And that is that there is no such thing as a safe conclusion.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

today

"...pobres diccionarios, que tienen que gobernarse ellos y gobernarnos a nosotros con las palabras que existen, cuando son tantas las que todavia faltan..."

Jose Saramago
Las intermitencias de la muerte

Friday, November 23, 2007

The colour magenta!


I was just informed that T-Mobile are in a legal fight against some Dutch brands on the use of the -otherwise ridiculous- colour Magenta, on which they claim to have the copyright. In plain words they claim the exclusive use of this colour, meaning that all you designers, graphical artists and painters out there should be very cautious in your choice of colouring or you may be in trouble.

As a subliminal form of protest -and after apologizing for any visual problems this may cause- I inform you that the background of the blog will remain ridiculously MAGENTA until the next post!

Having quite a few friends in the graphical arts business, I am aware of colours having been named after the "discoverer" of their particular wavelength. So I know there is a "pinish" green called Veronese, a dark red called "Tiziano" and I am very fond of "Klein blue". Until thirty minutes ago, I had a strong disdain for Magenta, but just the thought that I may soon no be able to use colour code #FF00FF suddenly puts me in the place of Eve in front of the forbidden fruit!

I am getting the urge to recite the most quoted phrase in this blog -that is "jokes aside"- but I cannot. Simply because I am now completely convinced that if there is something out there more ridiculous than the colour magenta, it must be without any doubt the laws of the market that allow some people to consider that they can put a copyright on a colour. I guess next Nike would like to patent curved lines, McDonalds will impose restrictions on the use of the capital "M" and RJ Reynolds Tobacco will claim exclusivity on representations of camels. Apart from the serious problems this is bound to inflict on painters specialized in desert landscapes, it may only mark the beginning of an era , when this blog would be highly expensive to maintain (given the combination of a Magenta background and 7 capital "M"s up to this point, not to mention the curvature implicit in Times New Roman).

I would therefore like your attention here. This blog is staying online just because of an inherent tenacity against ridiculous ideas put forward by extremely bored company lawyers, anxious to justify their incredibly high salaries. Support our cause and keep Magenta free!

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Departure Bay

I had to wake up early today, it's Wednesday and group meetings start at 9.30. As I walked through the morning mist, on the way to the lab, I was mostly thinking on stuff other than work. Yesterday's concert or what Borges would say or write about iPods and Kindles. As I watched the grey breaking waves on the beach of Barceloneta under the sounds of "Closing Time", utterly distracted from anything relevant of a working day just about to start, I felt a bit guilty.

Then the meeting started and finished, we had lunch, got back up, still trying not to be distracted anymore but it so turns out that distraction is the natural order of things. It becomes clear when right there in the midst of all the work you can't do, the daydreaming you can't avoid and the guilt you cannot get over, that you get a phone call bringing you back to earth. Then you forget all about guilt, you feel all work is futile and oblige yourself to daydreaming, realizing that at the background of all your plans and endeavors, life still goes on and most of the time it goes on the hard way.

I find it so hard now to think of Tom Waits explaining "Closing Time" or what Borges would say to someone losing a beloved father, since writing about death may be one thing but one's loss is something completely different. You try and try to put yourself in your friends shoes, hoping to be able to share the grief, thinking -in rigorous math logic- that sharing automatically means lessening the burden. But it's not like this at all, since death defies all logic and can only cast unequal shadows. And one's mourning is a solitary torment. All the rest of us can do is wait until the departure fades at the back of the mind and the good times are fossilized in memory as tokens of something beautiful that -like all that is beautiful- has come and gone.

So "shiver me timbers, 'cause I am a-sailin' away"

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

This modern love


A winter cold in November cannot last in Barcelona and as from yesterday we are back to normal with the wind slowing down leaving the mist hanging in the air, Gaudi's lizards stretching in the sun once more. In the midst of all that we start another week with the same old problems and brand new hopes. Last weekend was great, having seen a very beloved one after an annoyingly long time and it must have been exactly for this -and perhaps the lack of Sunday night football- that made the transition much more difficult than usual.

Monday proved to be -deservingly- frustrating as I passed most of it trying to change some of my best -best meaning most scientifically deceiving- plots and diagrams from any possible format to another. I came home destroyed and tensed, wishing ALL scientific journals perished into oblivion, so the only thing I could do was to lay back with a glass of tsipoyro and get back to my reading while listening to Stan Getz and "Stella by Starlight". But as music, words, image formats and electronic submissions of scientific articles were twirling inside my mind a weird obsession started to take me over. I had just read about amazon's latest device, the "kindle", a sort of "iPod for readers" allowing you to store and read thousands of e-books, newspaper articles and entire blogs on a tiny, portable screen with wireless connection, which you can keep in the inner pocket of your jacket. on the other hand, the thought of getting me one of this cool 160G iPods that could actually carry all the music I have owned or listened to in my 30-year life was already harassing me over the last weeks. So there I was fantasizing about two small devices that could carry the only two things I allow myself to be fetishist about: my books and my CDs. A kindle carrying all my books, an iPod with all my music, enough power to serve them for life and I am set!

I stopped and pondered. Not long ago I was criticizing cell-phone nations from this same blog and there I was thinking about all these gadgets that become obsolete before you even get to owe one of them. Then I just realized that during this daydreaming I had completely forgotten about "Stella by Starlight" and that my eyes were simply mechanically scanning lines in my real-paper book (actually it is Giuseppe's but still) in a process that was far from qualifying as constructive reading.

I woke up today and got out of bed with extreme difficulty. In fact there is a good chance I 'd still be there if it had not been for Bloc Party (on my faithful old and crappy mp3 player) and "This Modern love" that kept me up and going while riding the bike to work, thinking about all this modern gadgets that do so well in feeding our obsessions but very often tend to obstruct us from the real thing.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

sick but not tired


Over the last two weeks, I have gone through a serious attack of mucus of the most malicious kind that left me mostly inept for more than half of the days. This has fortunately helped me sleep in high pitch dreaming frequencies, allowed me to work at minimal -almost subsidence- levels and left me enough time to think, an activity which is widely known to be highly suppressed among members of the scientific community.

As in most cases -and as Borges would have been delighted to reassure the small readership of this blog, if only he was alive and bothered to do so- most of the things one thinks about have already been said or somehow expressed already. My -rather un-original- questioning can be no exception to the above rule. Therefore I can redirect the doubtful reader to the previous post where my dear Gustave (in the form and shape of a 19th century Diogenes) is cynically at his best!

Over the last days I have suffered meetings with (demanding) scientists, talked to (highly demanding) editors of (highly rated) scientific journals, anticipated the (un-dubiously defined as being all about "fun and money") talks of hot-shot researchers. All of the above -rather diverse but the least divertive activities- steered me on for some additional thinking. And as every activity, when undertaken by a scientist -or at least one who is being paid to behave as such- they had to boil down to some conclusion, which they did with no great complication. And it so turns out that listening to Queens of the Stone Age, watching "Dr. Strangelove" for the 5th time, re-reading some of Saramago's finest irony (re-written by him so that it is re-read as Borges would again assert had he bla-bla...) and -last but not least kicking- a ball around with some friends up in Mundet, are FAR more important, meaningful let alone amusing and mind-soothing than most of paper preparations or scientific talks. And that my dear Watson is a fact!

Over the next days I have to devote most of my time to prepare a manuscript for submission, which means a series of "self-improving" tasks such as changing format in references, adjusting image size and drafting a cover letter aiming at convincing, not mentioning impressing the editor that two years' work has been no waste and can be of virtual interest to him/her. It may prove to be so, since he or she (already so busy with other people's submissions) may not have yet submitted to the charms of either Saramago or Queens of the Stone Age. But as long as this humble submitter is concerned, the die is cast and nothing can convince me that these "self-improving" tasks are improving this self in any other level than the one of strengthening me against mental torture.

That I am still questioning all that, means I may be still sick (only without the mucus) but not tired. And that my dear Watson is yet another fact.

Sadly, deductions from these facts remain, still, elusive.

today

Science: Un peu de science ecarte de la religion et beaucoup y ramene

Baccalaureat: Tonner contre!

Gustave Flaubert
Dictionnaire des idees recues

Thursday, November 1, 2007

today

"...Πώς έγινε με τουτο τον αιώνα και γύρισε καπάκι η ζωή
πώς το φέραν η μοίρα και τα χρόνια να μην ακούσεις εναν ποιητή..."

Μάνος Ελευθερίου
Μαλαματένια λόγια

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Found myself in France...lost in translation

A last minute trip that turned out to be a great experience. It all started when Roderic (my rather easy-going boss) asked me to replace another colleague (Tyler) in a meeting to be held in Lyon. And he did it on such a short notice that even I (the ever-organized-travel-freak) had no time not even to check the exact address of my hotel.

I arrived in Lyon after an 8 hour train journey, only to realize that I had crossed multiple borders in space and time. Because apart from being in France and not in Catalunya anymore, I also found myself in the middle of the winter instead of the mild Barcelonian autumn. Still, adoring the view from the hill of La Fourviere was totally worth it.

What is the main reason for this post though is not Lyon, its two beautiful hills, its two marvelous rivers and the extra-heave local food specialties (try getting the full menu in a typical "bouchon lyonnais" and then sleeping...). Apart from admiring all that, I had a lot of time to spend with francophone people, practicing my otherwise poor french and realizing the beauty that lies hidden not in the differences of idioms but in the profound depths of our universal language itself. Meaning this ability for superposing multiple layers of meaning on an apparently simple structure.

It was on the train to Lyon from Montpellier while browsing last week's Courrier International, when I read this incredibly surrealistic piece of news. The Brazilian Minister of Interior Affaires had just banned the use of the gerund among the civil servants of the state! Clerks, secretaries and even directors were no more allowed to use everyday phrases like "I am working on it", or "we are looking into your problem" so that they do not give the false impression of escaping work by pretending to be doing it! It came as the first clue. Words have a meaning and the language is meaning.

But then, as I kept browsing a bit more, I came across an article about my hometown, Athens and one of its greatest problems, pollution. It was then, in the french translation of a greek article that the sound of my own mother tongue struck me. The Athenian smog, with all its carbon monoxide and ozon was left un-translated and referred to in its original greek term "νέφος" (in the text "nefos"). Suddenly I felt like the article was no more talking about the common smog, a polluting-meteorological phenomenon, but rather about a mythological monster attempting to devour a city cursed by its ancient god-protectors. It is in such cases that language apart from meaning something obvious, is at the same time inflicting a feeling.

Two days later, while spending my time at a bookstore in the center of Lyon, waiting for dinner, I bought "Feux", a collection of short stories and poems by my favourite Marguerite Yourcenar. Since it was still early I started reading it a bit but stopped only at the first phrase. "Je veux que ce livre ne soit jamais lu" (I want this book to be never read). This contradiction, so straight-forward and naive that sounds almost childish reminded me of the opposite declaration, once stated by Borges, according fact that he chose never to write a big novel because he thought the worlds is more in need of readers than writers. I sat back seeping my espresso and could not help but smile at the way the masters of verse use the language beyond both meanings and impositions, achieving an even higher meta-level, whose main inhabitants are ironies, metaphors, allusions and references.

And then I thought that compared to understanding all this, french should be a piece of cake.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

(Blog) Action Day... forever delayed


"All right it is December and I am walking around in my T-shirt! Whatever people may tell me, this cannot be normal, not for this hemisphere at least. Global warming is a fact and there are multiple proofs besides my sweat."

The picture and the phrase come from an old post of barcabios to prove once more that either mass protest comes always late, or that I am simply ahead of my time ;)

Blog Action Day about the environment had been declared for yesterday but I was busy doing other things. I apologize. I make my delayed contribution today, just because I believe not so much in the cause but in contributing per se. And since BA-day was yesterday, today may be the right day to whine about it. And first of all why "Action"? I think we will all agree that the situation is such based on the "actions" of some. Wouldn't "Reaction" make a bit more sense, or is it to harsh for them soft-Al-Gorish-late-worriers?

But lets stick to the "actions" (a term so wide so that it can include safely everything). I still do not see the possibility for any action here. You see, I sincerely think of all this global movement of people who don't have a say in anything to be almost completely worthless. What change will my blog ever make in improving the situation? I don't decide about general environmental policies, none of the political parties represented in my country's parliament has any serious suggestion about them and, lets face it, even if it had, do you really think these suggestions would make the real decision-makers, rain-forest cutters, oil-pumpers, energy-barons, sea-suckers, desert-spreaders worldwide lift an eyebrow?

So, I am sorry. I really doubt they 'll notice my blog complaining. They may smile sardonically while reading about Blog Action Day in today's 8-column titles of pretending-to-care newspaper first pages. And they 'll smile knowing that the more we write about it, the less we do about it, the more we learn about it, the less we feel obliged to actively deny it.

And the more we blog it, the less important it gets.

today

"...Le heros enchaine mantient dans la foudre et le tonnerre divins sa foi tranquille en l' homme. C' est ainsi qu' il est plus dur que son rocher et plus patient que son vautour..."

Albert Camus
Promethee aux Enfers

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

jigsaw falling into place


Last couple of days have been intense the wrong way. Coming to work early, leaving late, usually frustrated and yesterday even after having accidentally deleted part of my latest work. But we are having quite a nice beginning of autumn here in Barcelona so it's no wonder my mood is still far from blue.

And starting from this morning, with a lot of work having been done, all three of my bosses out of town and with the latest Radiohead album pounding in my headphones, I am so far from being blue that I am "in rainbows".

Radiohead just put out their latest, (7th) album which apart from being really good ("Weird fishes/Arpeggi" has looped my mp3 player 5 times already) it is also revolutionary. It is only available through the web and moreover from Radiohead's own server without any record company occupying the space between creators and admirers (or should I say "believers"). What is more is that everybody can choose the amount of money he's willing to pay for the download, starting from 0 (that is zero) euros, pounds, dollars or whatever it may be.

But enough with the propaganda. Loyal funs know about all this already. This blog is supposed to be a bit auto-biographical so we are reaching this point, at the end of the posts, where talking about Radiohead (or football, or the full moon, or rain) needs to be put in some perspective regarding everyday life in Barcelona. I am not really sure about how to do this, but the fact is that music (as well as football, the weather or the full moon) affects everyday life not only in Barcelona but all over the world.
Italo Calvino once described a city whose citizens were linked with visible strings according to their relations. And in a similar way music, sounds, images and all kinds of stimuli are constanlty creating invisible pieces of string, out of which the fabric of societies is made. This fabric is also invisible although not in-perceivable. People can feel its stretches and wrinkles, sense its texture ever-changing from rough to smooth and vice versa. These changes cannot but reflect a collective mood which you can sense all around you, on the streets, in the coffee shops and restaurants, in the way joggers smile at you in the morning, the newspaper guy hums his favourite song (music again), the bus driver whistles and your colleagues joke about everything. I am pretty sure that starting you day (and why not continuing it?) by listening to a nice tune can really make a change in this world.

So at least for today people be prepared. Because my contribution into "softening the fabric" is going to be something more than positive.

Sunday, October 7, 2007

today

"...Les villes que l' Europe nous offre sont trop pleines des rumeurs du passe. Une oreille exercee peut y percevoir des bruites d' ailes, une palpitation d' ames. On y sent le vertige des siecles, de revolutions, de la gloire. On s' y souvient que l' Occident s' est forge dans les clameurs. Cela ne fait pas assez de silence..."

Albert Camus
Le Minotaure

Thursday, October 4, 2007

today

"...Memory's images, once they are fixed in words, are erased..."

Italo Calvino

Invisible Cities

to see the lights



From the news today, a story of historic irony and vindication. The Bolivian soldier, who shot Ernesto "Che" Guevarra forty years ago, was operated free of charge by Cuban doctors in Bolivia. In this way, Mario Teran -let us mention his name for history to be equally just against heroes and fools- regained his damaged eyesight, thanks to a medical welfare program set out by the Cuban government. Thus, after forty years, it seems that the Cuban revolution is finally extending to Bolivia, even for the benefit of one of its most symbolic enemies. The man who shot Che...

At his 77 maybe the time has come for him to see the lights.

And I just wish for his own sake that the lights he sees are equally beautiful to the ones I see the over the past weeks, as the working day comes to an end, the dusk falls a bit earlier and I slowly ride alongside Barceloneta beach. Work may be hard these last days (see previous posts) but working in such a place is always rewarding, even when you leave the lab at 10 pm, heading home with a mind full of doubts and bearing with the obvious worry that you simply have no life.
But as the early autumn breeze blows down your face, you turn left on Joan de Borbo and you see the moon coming up behind the roofs of Passeig Colom, stopping only for a moment to flirt with the statue of the Virgin de La Merce, you come to decide that it is still worth it. You slow down your pace, let the wind cool you down and take off your headphones so that you sense the sounds of the city flowing all around.

Then, you realize the night is still far too young and that since you have no life, you might as well spend your evening watching the one of others. You take a turn and head back to Barceloneta, riding like a little kid. You listen to the waves, while watching a couple of cute girls jogging, then you lift up your head far to the edge of the beach, the night has fallen and the lights are setting it ablaze.

And you wish Mario Teran would see lights like these.


Wednesday, October 3, 2007

today


"... Yes, one could imagine a very pleasant world. A quiet, spacious world, with the flowers so red and blue in the open fields. A world without professors or specialists or house-keepers with the profiles of policemen, a world which one could slice with one’s thought as a fish slices the water with his fin, grazing the stems of the water-lilies, hanging suspended over nests of white sea eggs..."

Virginia Wolf
The mark on the wall

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

...you are now crossing the 38th parallel


In the news today, president of South Korea, Roh Moo-hyun crossing the borderline between South and North Korea (or North and South if you like), the famous 38th parallel along which the cease-fire back in 1953 set the borders between the two countries (and the two "worlds" supporting each one).

My crossing the line on the other hand is somehow different. It is less dramatic, not recorded by mainstream media, won't have any impact on world history plus it hasn't quite happened yet.

Nonetheless I may be close. Close to crossing the line from being a worrying-less, relaxed post-doc who spends most of his leisure time reading thick books and listening to long albums, to a poor, neurotic, hopeless guy who screams "Fucking genome assemblies!" in the middle of the lab. I spent a good part of the weekend trying to make sense of a stupid (sorry Pep) program, which is built in such a way so that only its creator can make full use of its potential, (in the same way only King Arthur could lift up the Excalibur or only Ulysses could string his bow). Then Monday came and after finally making some progress with this, I found myself surrounded by almost-overlapping genomic segments, succumbed in a sea of numbers that matched only marginally, when they should have been matching exactly, slowly sinking in a quicksand of tests, each of which led me far deeper into despair than the previous.

But I was strong. When things reached the point of no return (which in my case would be somewhere around 9) I still had the guts to stand up, award my screen with a look of anger and pity blending with discontent and walk away under the sounds of PJ Harvey singing "Before Departure"*. Only that I was just departing and I still had it! I could still say "screw them assemblies!", ride back home, joke with my flat mates about the vanity of life, the universe and everything, have some glasses of wine, then a beer with some friends and forget about it all.

It may sound the easy thing to do but I can tell you it is not. There have come many moments (and there may be more to come) when crossing the line seems like the right thing to do. Stay, fight and persevere. But who said our staying, fighting and persevering should only be carried out against genomic assemblies and alignment problems? I prefer to keep my strength for crossing this world's real 38th parallels, which may actually make the difference. After all, as Bjork once sang, "there's more to life than this"!


*Thanks Zoe, this album is just great

Saturday, September 29, 2007

today

"...Κι’ όμως δεν χαίρεται γι’ αυτήν την νίκη.
Το βλέμμα του μελαγχολία γεμάτο
την Σφίγγα δεν κυττάζει, βλέπει πέρα
τον δρόμο τον στενό που πάει στας Θήβας,
και που στον Κολωνό θ’ αποτελειώση.
Και καθαρά προαισθάνεται η ψυχή του
που η Σφιγξ εκεί θα τον μιλήση πάλι
με δυσκολώτερα και πιο μεγάλα
αινίγματα που απάντησι δεν έχουν..."

K. Π. Καβάφης
Οιδίπους

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

today


"...Puse la frente entre las olas profundas, descendi como gota entre la paz sulfurica y, como un ciego, regrese al jazmin de la gastada primavera humana..."

Pablo Neruda
Alturas de Macchu Picchu

today


"...porque fuiste siempre un espejo terrible, una espantosa maquina de repeticiones, y lo que llamabamos amarnos fue quiza que yo estaba de pie delante de vos con una flor amarilla en la mano, y vos sostenias dos velas verdes y el tiempo soplaba contra nuestras caras una lenta lluvia de renuncias y despedidas y tickets de metro..."

Julio Cortazar
Rayuela

Friday, September 21, 2007

Vaixell de Grecia



Once more a greek-catalan connection, coming from a Lluis Llach song. Despite of my being discouraged of listening to catalan songs by readers of this blog I keep catching up with the discography of this very interesting guy (the first citizen ever to take a prime minister to court for not keeping his promises...). At the same time I get very interested into his lyrics, especially when I see that quite a few of them are full of references to Greece.

Over the last days, basketball, football and (thirdly) work have not left me enough time to appreciate some really nice verses of some even better songs, but with the long weekend coming up and a local holiday approaching, I spared me a moment to do some research on my one and came up with an obscure philellene named Loukianos Trochiforos which has actually translated one of Llach's songs into Greek. The name of the song is "Vaixell de Grecia" (meaning Greek boat) and Trochiforos' translation is relatively free, (judging from my poor catalan). In any case I post it here with apologees to non-greek readers.

"Αργοναυτες"

Κατω απο τ'αστρα, που λεν στους ναυτικούς
για συμπληγαδες και τοπους μυστικους
διχως πυξιδα κι οι φαροι μακρια
ορθοι στην πλωρη, μα πουθενα στερια

Αλλου οι γοργονες, τα κατασπρα νησια
και των γονιων τους τα περγιάλια τα κρυφα
Τουτοι εχουν ροτα για του κοσμου την κορφη
και τα ονειρα τους, του Πρωτεα τη μορφη

Κι αν πεταλιδες τρυπουν τα στεγανα
κι αν η αλμυρα σαπιζει τα κουπια
μ'ενα τραγουδι φουσκωνουν τα πανια
κι ας περιμενουν φουρτουνες στα Στενα.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

My small country...


"My country is so small
that when the sun goes to sleep
nobody can be sure of having seen him
The wise old ladies say
that this is why he keeps coming back
My country is small
that from the top of one steeple
you can always see the next one
They say that the villages are afraid
of being alone
and of being too big
My country is so small
that she can fit in my heart
if life takes me away from her
and until they invent
detectors for the heart's secrets
we shall all be smugglers
of our small country"

The lyrics come from Lluis Llach, a great Catalan singer and composer (what the Spanish wisely call author/creator of songs). I listened to them today for the first time and I could not think of better words for my mood.

These last days I have thought about Greece more than the usual. Yesterday I witnessed the devotion, strength of character and constancy of the Greek national basketball team, probably a role model for all Greeks for its combination of talent, comradeship and confidence. Over my life I have passed from being an utterly fanatic hooligan to a normal, sane sports fun that simply does not miss a game. But in this team, European Champions two years ago, World Cup runners-up last year, who yesterday battled against World Champions and hosts, Spain until the last minute I see a lot more than a great team, mostly because they combine a lot of Greek virtues while perpetually defying all the flaws of our race. They never give up, they do not whine about their misfortunes, they never look for excuses. They take pride in victory and assume responsibility in defeat. They are confident in themselves but have no problem in recognizing the superiority of the opponent. I have seen teams maybe more talented than this one. But to date I have not come across a group of such character and dignity.

I have written, perhaps more than once, that I hate mixing politics with sports. Nonetheless I keep doing it, probably because it cannot be done otherwise. With the Greek elections taking place today, I just hope that a lot of my compatriots think a bit more before casting their vote. And that they think a bit more about this team and how nice it would be if we could create its political counterpart and send it to the Parliament.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

Twenty meters too far


Under the starry sky the sea was calm, the water, still and dark beneath the raft. Then a sudden noise of wood against stone, the small boat slightly bounced against the rock and stopped. For its tired passengers, legal dreamers, illegal travelers, the journey seemed to have reached the end. From the coast of Morocco to the Canary islands it must have been a long way. Now, as many before them and a lot more to come, they have made it to Europe.

Only they did not know. They did not know that Europe was still twenty meters farther, that the coast was there at their reach but their raft was stuck on a "u"-shaped reef. So close, yet so far. In the darkness of the night, obscured by exhaustion and anticipation they fell into the dark waters and sank, the burden of hope too heavy for them to bear.

They have traveled as stowaways, guided by false lighthouses, monitored by evil satellites. They would have arrived as castaways and would have lived as outlaws, feeding on hope while sending money back to their families.

These ten just did not make it. They drowned tragically last night, near Risco Verde in the Gran Canaria. They were not the first, nor will be the last.

Friday, September 7, 2007

Cell-phone Nation


I 'll start by using the favourite line of a very good friend.

"Maybe it's just me being weird"

Yes maybe it is just me but then maybe I am not and it's just (part of) the rest of the world going nuts. Here is the story that triggered all this questioning.

Yesterday I was watching the news on Spanish TV. Pavarotti's death was -of course- among the first. The "Maestro" was the one who put opera back into the radio station play-lists, exposed younger audiences to "serious" music and -alongside Carreras and Domingo- liberated football funs from being characterized as un-cultured idiots, through the famous 3 Tenors concerts at the World Cups of 1990, 1994 and 1998.

But it was not the news, or the covering of the story. It was the behaviour of the people themselves, the so-called funs of Pavarotti, or simply his fellow citizens of Modena, standing outside his house, waiting for the car to go out carrying him to his last residence. Then finally the car appeared out of the garage and started its slow process through the stone-paved streets of Modena. A moment supposed to be dedicated to grief and respect to the "Maestro". But instead of the (appropriate?) silence or the last applause, all the people could think of was to take out their cellphones, lift them up high enough above the crowd's protruding heads and try to take the best shot/video of the event. It really shocked me. These people were supposedly there to say the last goodbye (or the next to last, since they can also attend the funeral) and instead of that they were taking cell-phone photos of what? The black limo carrying Pavarotti's casket?

It looks that all this technology, cell-phones, e-mails, voice-mails, video-mails and "mails from the other side" in general, has changed not only our lives but also the way we think about a lot of stuff. And the new way is NOT thinking about a lot of stuff. We have come to admiring sunny beaches through digital cameras, whispering to our lovers through skype and listening to music through ringtones. We miss half of the concerts to take photos and videotape the funeral of a legend.

Perhaps it's just me being weird, but the day may be close when news will be only RSS feeds, friends will be only met on facebook and all we 'll be reading will be our stupid blogs.

Monday, September 3, 2007

Earth, wind and fire...


this summer was supposed to be something different from what it turned out to be.

I hoped for cool waters and summer breeze and I saw too much of dry earth and burning wood. I was longing for the smell of the salty sea but got dust and ashes instead. I was hoping for fun and laughter but got blue mood and grey faces.

Life is like this. It does not always give us the expected. And the four weeks I spent in Greece were at a large part a sad reminder. Not that there were no nice moments. During my stay I witnessed the wedding of a very good friend, (and maybe danced too badly while celebrating it, so badly that people had to throw water on me to make me stop). I had the chance to visit the south of Crete for the second time in my life (to be once more reassured of the special beauty of the place and the kindness of its people) and did not miss the opportunity to revisit familiar, favourite places in Sifnos, meet with old friends and make some new ones. I had the chance to spend some time with someone I love, verify what keeps us together, realize what stands between us and stick to the first.

But the good moments end there...

At that point this weird August, filled with flames, hot winds and bad news, started its charge. As the phone kept ringing with an absurd frequency bringing news of sickness and loss, the screens started their own bombardment of televised catastrophes, villages in flames, people perishing and ...finally Ancient Olympia caught in the midst of this burning hell.

It was then that we all find it hard not to crack. Because one may handle the destruction of objects and the decline of moral, one can even suffer lightly the human loss, but he cannot stand the destruction of the symbols, the decay of the living memory and the loss of his identity.

They say general Makriyannis, one of Greece's heroes of independence once stopped some local chieftain trying to sell antiquities to the British in exchange for guns. And when the chieftain told him that the guns were needed to keep up the fight for a free country, Makriyannis told him that these same antiquities were what they were fighting for, these ancient pieces of marble, that cannot be reborn or sprang out of the earth, were the free Greece they were dreaming of. And that without them there was no need for struggle or fighting.

The marbles of Olympia were saved, although only at the last moment. Thus there is still reason for battle and struggle.

A day like today, Makriyannis forced the King of the young, independent Greece to grant constitution to its people. The brave, stubborn general kept fighting until the end for a better place for his children. Let us follow his example.

Sunday, July 29, 2007

ViennaBios - Lessons from a conference


I spent last week in Vienna, the last destination of a series of travels this semester, before heading back to Greece for the holiday. The official excuse, was the ISMB/ECCB conference (which will be understood by bioinformatics geeks only but seriously the rest of you do not need to know!) And amazingly enough the conference was indeed the place where I spent most of my time while awake. Apart from its huge size in all aspects (participants, parallel sessions, exhibitions, 1000 posters etc) it was particularly interesting in a a number of ways, not all having to do with Science. I 'll postpone writing about Vienna for another post (or maybe another journey) and stick to the lessons a young (and lets admit only marginally promising) scientist can get from a conference.

Lesson #1: (As in most sectors of human activity) the people who really matter are most likely the ones who have been around for quite a while.
They are in general under-dressed, have awful haircuts, horrible powerpoint slides (they actually do not use overhead projectors because they are not allowed to do so) and use old-fashioned vocabulary. They are also wiser, wittier and more clever than the average speaker, they do not talk crappy-fashionable-scientific-voodoo-buzz-words all the time, have a wide knowledge of the problem they are dealing with, are more interested in questions than in answers, finish their talks with more criticism than perspective, use the language in a better way. Strangely (or not) they tend to have a totally different background than most of the attendants of the conference. Not surprisingly they have little or no impact on young researchers who carry on doing their thing...
And that is the non-optimistic lesson!

Lesson #2: Class battle exists in science
I had the chance to attend two talks by the same person given on the same day, on the same subject, to different audiences. the first one opened with an impressive introduction, carried on under flashes of photo cameras and ended with the presentation of an award for the speaker, which -as the organizers kindly informed the puzzled audience- left no time for questions. A couple of hours later, the recently awarded young scientists had to face a wave of criticism and really hard questions from a suspected audience who did not really care about awards or not forming part of this special cast of awarded, or invited speakers. To me it looked that what was was under criticism was, apart from the presented work, the whole system of evaluating scientific work through impact factors and k-indexes. It appeared that a great majority was somehow pissed at being steered by an arbitrary, self-acclaimed, scientific avant-guard, which decides what is worth it and what is not, not only when it comes to scientific answers but -and that is dreadfully WORSE- scientific questions as well.
To the unsuspected, innocent young post-doc I am, it really looked like scientific class battle of the best kind.
And that was the optimistic lesson!

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Roots...


I guess the post titles ending in "..." are supposed to add a sort of nostalgic, hanging-in-the-air feeling to it, but you may be right if you think it is becoming tiring.

...however...

(here we go again!)

A long, sighing "anyway" before moving on, and that is in all possible ways. Over the last week, I have been talking with people on the phone, reading their blogs (or their comments in mine), or discussing with them directly and I got the same feeling from practically everybody. They all need holidays. Either from having worked too hard these last months, having been bored to death or simply because it's summer, in any case people are starting to think of the sea much more often around this period, at least on this side of the planet.

Moreover, and without any loss of generality, we can certainly argue that the geometric locus of the exiled Greeks' dreams is, and will always be, the Aegean Sea (and who ever dares can try to prove me wrong). Nonetheless, I don't think it's so much being tired (the case for most) or lazy (my case) for longing Sifnos, Crete or Schinousa. I 'd rather say it has to do more with our roots than with our mood or stamina. And our roots, whether we want to admit it or not, are inextricably weaved with the pines at the seashores of our childhood, buried in the sand of our teenager holiday beaches, or floating at the edge of the deep green sea of our youth. More prosaically, we need to go back in time, more than in space. And since (as an elderly wise man like Eric Hobsbawm puts it) the past is a different place, we still consider going back as a journey.

I felt his clearly only ten days ago, standing at the shore of this lagoon in Vivari, close to Nayplio, the place where I have spent a number of my childhood summers and which I have been visiting unstoppably ever since. Yes, the past is a different place, but let's admit it, it is a nice place to visit every now and then. On the other hand, no one can convince me that we are living lives so miserable or unworthy, for "nostalgia" to be the only way out.

In the end, for all you Greeks out there, the meaning of "nostalgia" itself (αλγος του νοστου) is actually the "pain of returning home" and this is exactly how Homer meant it. The fact that coming back almost always means also going back in time and this is -most of the times- painful. But what the hell! If after an unknown number of massive cataclysms, the rise and fall of a hundred empires and numerous scientific revolutions we still remain as much of a "masochist" as Ulysses, then -Zeus damn it!- it must mean something. And paraphrasing Kavafis, it may be worth even longing for the journey...

(and there you have them again, these three dots in the end)

Thursday, July 12, 2007

missing the point...


On a day like this (or to put it better days like this) I should have been writing about a whole bunch of things. Antonio Machado's verses on the hot, dry summers of Andalusia, Serrat's songs about being Mediterranean (see Soundtrack), how Kastoriades understood the ancient Greeks (see Wordtrack) in a way no Greek had ever done before. Or more down to earth stuff like running onto Woody Allen and Scarlet Johanson having beer in Barceloneta, Arcade Fire preparing for Summercase festival or simply strolling down -staying at the shady parts- the sunny, quiet streets of the Gotic like the one you see in the photo.

But unfortunately I can't tell you about these things, simply because over the last few days, all these rather important stuff have been set aside and "work" has occupied my time in -lets say- a bit excessive way. I am not in a position to wine about this, having just recovered from a long overseas journey, followed by a short trip back to Greece. But still, it is the idea of it that pisses me of. Summer is here, -although not as warm as I might have expected- and my mind tends to drift more and more to the "labyrinth paths" (another reference to Kastoriades) that have to do with the ergodic literature of Milorad Pavic, the elegant melodies of Radiohead (good old stuff revisited), daydreaming strange stories that could have been written by Marquez, daywatching goals that were actually scored by Messi, talking about the history of the Balkans (an issue not to be taken lightly I can assure you), in general an incredibly variable amount of things that sadly does not include the keywords "nucleosomes", "microarrays" or "hormone-induction".

Nonetheless, it is keywords like these last ones that occupy most of my (precious) time and my even most precious little mind. It is funny but sometimes you find yourself squeezing out all the energy within towards tasks that look completely useless. Am I missing the point here?
Before I totally flip out, I should better pack my stuff and head home, have a glass of wine and watch a good film. And maybe just for the fun of it -and after having read Feyerabend's views on scientific method once more- I try once more to think about how to solve some problems, just before going to bed. A bit dizzy, after having read some more of Machado's verses, listened to a little more Radiohead and a lot more prone to thinking that science is not that much different than art.

And then maybe I come up with a solution that is not optimal, but at least beautiful.

Monday, July 2, 2007

What's new? ...and what is"news"?


I spent last week back in Barcelona, with loads of work but in very good company. This sort of homecoming has been warmer than I would have hoped for and it definitely put me in a good mood. Nonetheless, I remain in a sort of loose attachment to the US and news from the other side are still affecting my humour. Some of them are quite astonishing.

Last Wednesday back in good new US of A, CNN's star journalist Larry King was to interview Michael Moore about his latest documentary "Sicko" dealing with the country's (in-existing) social security system. Moore remains a controversial figure in the States even after having won two Palmes d' Or and wide acceptance in Europe. His interview was highly anticipated especially after allegations that he might even be persecuted for filming in Cuba, thus breaking the long-standing embargo. But it so turns out that as in many aspects of life, in modern electronic journalism as well, there is always a bigger fish that can eat the smaller. And it appears that nowadays in the USA there can be no bigger fish, than the ultimate star of emptiness, probably the world's most renown person for having done absolutely nothing, a legendary personality of mythically quantum proportions, the planet's most famous person for just being famous, the greatest celebrity of them all, Ms Paris Hilton!!!

For the ignorant residents of the Old Continent, who -like me- thought until recently that the aforementioned princess of nullity was actually the hotel of the French capital, I can only contribute by providing the background. Ms Hilton was once arrested for driving drank and her license was revoked. After having been spotted to drive (an achievement not easily undermined for such a person) without a license, she was miraculously sent to prison for a three-week term, during which the earth (or at least its US counterpart) stood still, holding its breath before the suffering and torment of the young damsel. Last week she was let go after serving her sentence and the media where there to capture the scene live, on a broadcast that according to an eye-witnessing journalist was covered "less like the liberation of Paris Hilton and more like the liberation of Paris itself in 1944".

During the last days of our princess' imprisonment and while she was still scribbling down her memories of the ordeal in the pages of her version of "Notes from the Underground" or "Prison Diaries" (soon to a bookstore near you), the mainstream media were negotiating a price with her family for her first interview after three weeks in captivity (pardon me, I meant imprisonment). ABC offered 100.000 dollars, then rumours put the number set by NBC in the upper 6 digits but when the word was out and in fear of a(nother) scandal the Hilton family fell back and granted the interview free to CNN and Larry King. The "King" of interviews was highly discouraged to complain once he was explained that Paris Hilton is the "hottest" interview he could get right now next to Usama Bin-Laden. And so it went. CNN set a timer counting down to hour-0, the blond debutant came, saw and conquered tens of millions of spectators, reading parts from the aforementioned "Prison diaries" finally and irrevocably proving to her critics all over the world that YES she can read! The show was repeated only a couple of hours later after nationwide demands.

What do I care? I think, apart from the ridiculous side, there are some issues at stake here. Electronic media are proving to be something different that what they initially set out to do (or aren't they). Smart asses running CNN, FOXnews, NBC e.t.c. care less and less everyday, about what really matters and could thus be classifiable as "news" and more about what would bring audience, therefore money. If people care about what Paris Hilton has to say, the media will give them exactly that. Some will be touched by the drama of the suffering heiress, some will have a chance to feel extremely clever just by comparison, some may even be pissed that a girl at her age, status and level of accomplishments (please stop laughing it's politically incorrect) gets to better treatment than the UN general secretary or a Nobel laureate. What they all missed was a chance to listen to Michael Moore explaining to them why they are likely to die without help if a hurricane leaves their city in ruins or a madman with a shotgun severely injures them in their college dorm. But that is a different story.

So what do I care? It would be so much better if the "audience" (and this of course includes me as well, I was watching CNN while in the US) would ask themselves the same question. What the freaking hell do I care about Paris Hilton? And just so as to add an optimistic tone, "Glory and Honour" to a real journalist, Mika Brzesinski of MSNBC who after reading the news about Paris' "freedom" tried to burn the script with a lighter live in the studio and apologized to the spectators for having to open the newsflash with such an incredibly stupid and useless piece of information...Once more proving that there are people over there that still think.

(pay tribute to Mika Brzezinski by adding one more hit to her action at youtube)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VdNcCcweL0


Goodnight and good luck!

Friday, June 29, 2007

Back in Barcelona...


anonymous log entry...Barcelona June 2007

As the sun goes down behind the last line of waves in the Mediterranean, I am only waking up. The first blow of the late evening breeze hits me directly as I stand on the terrace of the lab, dizzy and tired after a day of incredibly stupid ideas, sloppy programming and unavoidably dissapointing results. The night falls, the horizon dresses in orange and purple and my mood throws down its blue gown. The 24 hour day is still young. I ride my bike by the sea shore, Arcade Fire pounding on my mp3 player, thoughts become clearer, scientific issues seem to resolve themselves miraculously and the heavy veil of dizziness is suddenly lifted. "How come I havent thought about it before?" This idea deserves a beer! As I skillfully avoid crashing against a bus and hitting an old lady crossing Passeig Joan de Borbo I have already set the date through a network of expanding sms. I arrive at the Rambla de Raval sweaty and starving, half of the people are already here and the feast of spicy, indian masala, catalan beer and conversations in five different languages begins. As the Greeks and the French realize that we share 90% of the jokes, the Spanish and the Germans that they are more alike than their complexions might have implied, the Portuguese make fun of the way the Brazilians speak and vice versa, we find ourselves lost in the small streets of Raval and then on the other side of la Rambla in the Gotico. We bearly escape a storm of water falling from the sky only to understand the residents are aiming at our precious heads, so full of worl-changing ideas, yet equipped with overwhelmingly loud vocal chords. We decide to keep it down as we enter "13" bar and the noise resumes as soon as the first round of mojitos arrives. It must be past midnight but who cares? Scientists never stop working, so no guilt about connecting simulation models to football strategies, or calculating the conditional probability of picking up the girls at the other side of the bar. As the probability increases asymptotically with the number of mojitos, we only realize the night is getting old. The dawn finds us on Passeig Maritim, the sun is going up behind the distant buildings in Forum and we are already on our way to the lab. The day is only beginning in Barcelona. Someone else may tell you how it is going to be, but my guess would be at least interesting.

...

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Oh what did you see my darling young one?


So it is official! After a month and a half on the other side of the Atlantic, this different, fascinating world, full of marvels and contradictions, I am back in good old Europe.

These last six weeks have been intense to say the least, providing food for thought on many levels apart from real, good-friend, traditional fun, especially during the last days. But on these last days, spent in Yellowstone Park, I'll try to come back soon. For now I can only bid farewell to the USA and since six weeks is too much time to allow me to go into detail, I will just try to put everything plainly but at the same time lyrically in the style of the great Bob Dylan, trying to condensate images, sounds and thoughts in a handful of verses.

So let's go...

...[
Oh, where have you been, my blue-eyed son?
Oh, where have you been, my darling young one?
I've ridden a steel bird all over the ocean
I've stood on the shore of the opposite side
I've strolled all along in the yards of old legends
I've walked all the way to get out of their shadow
I've drifted away where the time is forgotten
And it's a hard, and it's a hard, it's a hard, and it's a hard,
And it's a hard rain's a-gonna fall.

Oh, what did you see, my blue-eyed son?
Oh, what did you see, my darling young one?
I saw an old man forced down by his name
I saw a blind mob hurraying in the vacuum
I saw the big city lights, they were glowing for no one
I saw people running, with nowhere to go to
I saw people standing, wishing they could fly away
I saw the great wide open, it looked like it was narrowing
I saw the steep canyons and they looked to be widening
I saw ten million travelers and they were all taking photographs
I saw ten million photographs and they all looked the same
And it's a hard, and it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard,
And it's a hard rain's a-gonna fall.

And what did you hear, my blue-eyed son?
And what did you hear, my darling young one?
I heard "hello" and "goodbye" and they both had not meaning
I heard "Godspeed" and "farewell" and they both sound real
I heard the "welcome" at last and it made me wonder
I heard the clapping of hands echoing nothingness
I heard ten thousand cars all honking their horns
I heard ten thousand horns instead of ten thousand screams
I heard the radio shouting and the TV mumbling
I heard the people's silence, so sad and so lonely
I heard the sound of the thunder again and again
And it's a hard, and it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard,
And it's a hard rain's a-gonna fall.

Oh, who did you meet, my blue-eyed son?
Who did you meet, my darling young one?
I met a living legend and he let me down
I met ordinary people and they lifted me up
I met an elderly woman, she was crying at the bus stop
I met an old guy worrying and people thought he was crazy
I met a young, crazy girl and she was worried about nothing
I met a working-class girl, looking outside the window
I met Asians and Arabs and Greeks and Americans
And they were all going around as if nothing was happening
But it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard,
It's a hard rain's a-gonna fall.

Oh, what'll you do now, my blue-eyed son?
Oh, what'll you do now, my darling young one?
I'm a-goin' back out before the rain starts a-fallin',
I 'll walk through the streets of an old, forgotten continent
I 'll swim across all the seas of my ancient country
Where the people each talk their own different language
Where the sick and the healthy are still liking each other
Where the blacks and the whites still work next to each other
Where the sun may still shine while the clouds are a-gathering
Where they all are somebody but they want to be nobody
Where they all want to be someone they are not
Where the world rules the money but it's starting to change
And I'll see it and think it and speak it and laugh at it
And I'll watch over the shore as the ships will be leaving
Like the old times when people still had a dream and a hope
And I 'll stay there until the ships start a-coming
And the people with dreams come back with their hopes
And the people with hope come back with the dreams
'Cause we need them and their dreams and their hopes and their coming

'Cause it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard,
It's a hard rain's a-gonna fall.
]...

get the original song's lyrics here

Saturday, June 9, 2007

BostonBios - is this not America?


Paraphrasing David Bowie the day begins as the working week is ending. I start walking on Brighton Avenue with Beth Orton singing "Comfort of strangers", as I am still as much of a stranger as I feel strange after a whole month in the US. The streetcar slowly slides on Commonwealth on our way to Boston University, the sun is making its shy appearance behind New England's thin but almost permanent cloud layer. Boston University Central, I am starting to think about work and no comfort is to be found in any song. Over the past few days I have gone from worrying that work is not going well, through doubting about my aptness in it, to finally realizing that something is going wrong. Still hanging on through one of the, seldom, self-esteem panic attacks that took me over two days ago, I pump up the volume of the Rolling Stones as the streetcar approaches Blanford Station. "All down the line", this is where I get off.

As I sit myself at the desk, getting my laptop out of my backpack, I am still thinking. Is this what I was hoping for in the US? Tough call. A great city, some of the finest minds of science strolling on the same sidewalks, ambitious students trying to cope with inspiring professors, all seems to be here but something is still missing. Is it me that is not fit for this or am I still having trouble to conciliate with the nature of research? Is something really going wrong or have I just lost my calm, placid, philosophical approach to scientific work? And if it is so, what is wrong with me? Have I lost it?

I see all these people constantly talking about science, perpetually overwhelmed by their ideas or struck by the lack of them, astounded or frustrated by their results. Distraught in their small, isolated worlds, where a protein may be more important than summer coming, or a plot more meaningful that the full moon. It suddenly hits me. Where has the fun gone? I check my e-mails and amazingly feel homesick for a place, where I have only lived and worked for less than a year and a half. I watch the video of my colleagues back in Barcelona, celebrating the first anniversary of the new institute building and there I realize that fun somehow is an endemic species of the Mediterranean.

The day goes on, void of serious thoughts, with unimportant results filling the vacuum. Around five I am the only one left in the lab, alone in front of the screen with John Coltrane's sax and Eric Dolphy' s flute, keeping me the kind of company you can only appreciate when lonely. I am still having trouble believing how everybody is gone so early. I always had the idea that people in the US work crazy hours. But on second thought and given that I haven't heard a single joke (let alone a laughter) in the lab over these three weeks, I can understand why everyone is so eager to leave early. This is a strictly working place. We take positions early in the morning, make it through our shift with our headphones on and head on home with relief as soon as possible.

Gandhi once said that "what we do is not important, but it is important that we do it". I just hoped one of the things for which Gandhi died would be that some of us - maybe still a few but hopefully soon to be more - would also be able to enjoy part of what we are doing. If not, at least try to make it this way, mixing everyday work with the real life, the laughters, the irony, the feeling that you are sharing the desk with other people and not just "scientists", with whom you can also talk about football, rugby, women (or maybe men), music instead of just "false positive rates". Coming from a country that does not deserve any merit in science and research for the last two millenia, I find it hard to believe that I ended up even reminiscing my lab days in Greece, where we had no subscriptions to journals, fast internet or air-condition that actually worked. At least there, you would walk down the hall and people would say. There you would take your breaks talking about sports or politics to the people next door.

I shut down my computer, lock the door and make for the elevator. On my way I say "goodbye" to the cleaning-guy who looks surprised. He has still not been used to me being the only person on the floor talking to him. But then again, I still find it hard to see people looking the other way when I say "hi" upon meeting them on the corridor.

This is not me complaining. It's just me realizing.
Realizing that I have a great job and realizing that it is great not because of its nature but because me and my colleagues have fortunately decided it should be made in one specific way. That is the Mediterranean way, the fun way.

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

BostonBios - Fog Warning


It is not only lately that my mood is highly correlated with the weather. But these last days have been something else. We somehow passed from warm, humid (in the absolutely literal sense)Saturday night to wake up on a chilly Sunday morning to go through a melancholic Sunday afternoon pouring with rain. And today I woke up in a hurry to get to the lab meeting to find myself lost inside the fog in the middle of Commonwealth Avenue. The air was so stuffy and humid, that although it was not raining I was actually walking through droplet of water and there appeared to be rain falling horizontally, if not floating in the air.

I just decide it was one of these Monday mornings, that they can also happen on this side of the Atlantic and that this foul, morning mood, combined with the bad weather and the beginning of a working week, signified a rite of passage for me eventually realizing that after some weeks even being 3000 miles away from the office can still mean working routine.

Apart from all that maybe it is better that this weather continues. The summer is only starting and all I can think of is sunny days, the sound of waves and the taste of salt mixed with white wine on my lips. And it is funny how sometimes we realize that we need unpleasant atmosphere to bring us back on the ground. The New England fog and the horizontal rain saved the day, putting my butt on the desk.

Apart from all that, life in Boston is evolving somehow in parallel with reality. Ever since I got here I have left behind a number of everyday activities such as reading the papers or following the news in general. My only connection with what is going on in this country has been watching the next to last Eastern Conference NBA semifinal at a bar in Allston last Thursday. In fact I have no idea of what is happening in the USA, or to put it better what are the issues that are concering the people here. This lack of information has not disturbed me yet although maybe just checking the weather forecast sometimes might save me the trouble of waking up surprised to a foggy day.